Funny photos - A TRIBAL FIGHT WITH CELL PHONE

A TRIBAL FIGHT WITH CELL PHONE

The theme of the movie is based on the famous South African film The Gods Must be Crazy, a crazy goofy movie rocked in the eighties in which a African tribal faces the scientific modern world in the form an empty coke bottle. In Tamil the coke bottle has been replaced with a Cell phone.

FUNNY PHOTOS

* A friend is one who knows us, but loves us anyway.

* Remember, the greatest gift is not found in a store nor under a tree, but in the hearts of true friends.

* Who finds a faithful friend, finds a treasure.

Funny Childhood

* In every real man a child is hidden that wants to play. ~Friedrich Nietzsche

* When I grow up I want to be a little boy. ~Joseph Heller, Something Happened, 1974

* Every child is an artist. The problem is how to remain an artist once he grows up. ~Pablo Picasso

* The reluctance to put away childish things may be a requirement of genius. ~Rebecca Pepper Sinkler

* If children grew up according to early indications, we should have nothing but geniuses. ~Johann Wolfgang von Goethe

Campfire Song Song Video

Campfire Song Song 2

Campfire-Song-Song-2 - Get Video Code

Love Quotes

(1) Flirt for fun and frivolity. Be creative in your flirting. Pretend you are together for the first time or that you are trying to pick up your lover.

(2) Gaze into each other's eyes with a steady intention to say, "I love you" without words. Smile. Notice the eye color. Say something nice about them. Be generous with your love.

(3) Have a private party for just the two of you. Candles, music, the works. Talk. Listen. Express your love for one another.

(4) Indulge each other's desires. Write your secret desires on pieces of paper and trade. You may be surprised.

(5) Joke and have fun together. Lighten up. Be joyous. Release your sense of humor. Have fun with love.

Love Quotes

Broken Heart Quotes :: 1

It takes a minute to like someone, and hour to love someone, but to forget someone takes a life time.

Broken Heart Quotes :: 2

Take away love and our earth is a tomb.

Robert Browning

Broken Heart Quotes ::3

Hearts live by being wounded

Oscar Wilde

One Line Jokes

* Where was King Solomon's temple?
On his forehead.

* What do you get if you cross rabbits and termites?
Bugs bunnies.

* What did Cinderella say to the photographer?
Some day my prints will come.

* How does a flea get from place to place?
By itch-hiking.

* Can April March?
No, but August May.

* What's got a trunk, lots of keys and four legs?
A piano up a tree.

* What starts with E, ends with E but usually has one letter?
An envelope.

* What does a bee use to brush its hair?
A honeycomb!

* What did the porcupine say to the cactus?
Is that you, Mama?

* What did the snail say when he rode on the turtle's back?
WHEEEEEEEE!

Joke Short Stories

Hearing Aid

A man realized he needed to purchase a hearing aid, but he felt unwilling to spend much money.

"How much do they run?" he asked the clerk.

"That depends," said the salesman. "They run from 100 bucks to 10,000."

"Let's see the cheaspest model," he said.

The clerk put the device around the man's neck.

"You just stick this button in your ear and run this little string down to your pocket," he instructed.

"How does it work?" the customer asked. "For 100 RS it doesn't work," the salesman replied. "But when people see it on you, they'll talk louder!"
-------------------------------------------------------------------------
Age Fabrication

A lady is having a bad day at the roulette tables in Vegas. She's down to her last $50.

Exasperated, she exclaims, "Only bad luck! What in the world should I do now?"

A man standing next to her suggests, "I don't know... why don't you play your age?"

He walks away. Moments later, his attention is grabbed by a great commotion at the roulette table. Maybe she won!

He rushes back to the table and pushes his way through the crowd. The lady is lying limp on the floor, with the table operator kneeling over her.

The man is stunned. He asks, "What happened? Is she all right?"

The operator replies, "I don't know. She put all her money on 29, and 36 came up. Then she just fainted!"

--------------------------------------------------------------------
LIPSTICK PROBLEM

A principal of a small middle school had a problem with a few of the older girls starting to use lipstick. After applying lipstick in the bathroom they would then press their lips to the mirror and leave lip prints [purportedly practicing the perfect pucker].

Before it got out of hand he thought of a way to stop it. He gathered all the girls together who wore lipstick and told them he wanted to meet with them in the ladies room at 2 pm.

They gathered at 2pm and found the principal and the school custodian waiting for them.

The principal explained that it was becoming a problem for the custodian to clean the mirror every night. He said he felt the ladies did not fully understand just how much of a problem it was to remove the waxy lipstick, and he wanted them to witness just how hard it was to clean. The custodian then demonstrated...

He took a long brush on a handle out of a box. He then dipped the brush in the nearest toilet, moved to the mirror and proceeded to remove the lipstick.

That was the last day the girls pressed their lips on the mirror.

source:santabanta.com

Some Funny Jokes

The Preacher and Parrot-Joke

A preacher is buying a parrot.

"Are you sure it doesn't scream, yell, or swear?" asked the preacher.

"Oh absolutely. It's a religious parrot," the storekeeper assures him.

"Do you see those strings on his legs? When you pull the right one, he recites the lord's prayer, and when you pull on the left he recites the 23rd Psalm."

"Wonderful!" says the preacher, "but what happens if you pull both strings?"

"I fall off my perch, you stupid fool!" screeched the parrot.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Student Vs Professor

After having failed his exam in "Logistics and
Organization ", a student goes and confronts his
lecturer about it.

Student: "Sir, do you really understand anything about
the subject?"

Professor: "Surely I must. Otherwise I would not be a
professor!"

Student: "Great, well then I would like to ask you a
question.

If you can give me the correct answer, I will accept
my mark as is and go. If you however do not know the
answer, I want you give me an "A" for the exam. "

Professor: "Okay, it's a deal. So what is the
question?"

Student: "What is legal, but not logical, logical, but
not legal, and neither logical, nor legal? "

Even after some long and hard consideration, the
professor cannot give the student an answer, and
therefore changes his exam mark into an "A", as
agreed.

Afterwards, the professor calls on his best student
and asks him the same question.

He immediately answers: "Sir, you are 63 years old and
married to a 35 year old woman, which is legal, but
not logical. Your wife has a 25 year old lover, which
is logical, but not legal. The fact that you have
given your wife's lover an "A", although he really
should have failed, is neither legal, nor logical ."

Drink, Smoke And Have Sex-Science Joke

In a school science class four worms were placed into
four separate jars.

The first worm was put into a jar of alcohol.

The second worm was put into a jar of cigarette smoke.

The third worm was put into a jar of sperm.

The fourth worm was put into a jar of soil.

After one day, these were the results:

The first worm in alcohol - dead.

Second worm in cigarette smoke - dead.

Third worm in sperm - dead.

Fourth worm in soil - alive.

So the Science teacher asked the class - "What can you
learn from this experiment?"
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ U & I In T his Beautiful W ORLD

Who invented A,B,C,D,E,..............................Z did a great
thing.
But he kept U and I very very far.

But I still got a place where U and I are very close..... in fact
together.......

Do you know where U and I can be together.........

Scroll down..
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.It is on the keyboard.....

STUPID , don't see the keyboard now!!

PASS THIS TO EVERYONE YOU KNOW

Love Quotes

(1) Hearts are not to be had as a gift
earts are to be earned...

(2) True love doesn't have a happy ending:
True love doesn't have an ending.

(3) You don't love a woman because she's beautiful,
She is beautiful because you love her.

(4) Love is not a matter of counting the years...
But making the years count.

(5) Only love let's us see normal things
In an extraordinary way.

Joke Short Stories

Funniest Joke

Once Santa & Banta were travelling along with their friends Monty & Jaggi. On a road surrounded by forests on both sides, their car was attacked by robbers. Santa & his friends were pulled out of the car. The robbers blasted the car and took Santa, Banta and their friends in the middle of the forest where their boss was residing.

Now, this boss was fond of jokes. So, he put the condition that whoever tells a joke that makes every single person laugh should be left unharmed and alive, but if one single person doesn't laugh then the joke-teller would be shot to death.

Banta started telling the funniest joke he had ever heard, "One day........." and when he was finished, everybody were falling with laughter except Santa. So according to the vow, the boss shot poor Banta.

Now, it was the turn of Monty. He also told the best joke he had ever heard. Again everybody laughed including the boss & his robbers, but still Santa was quite as a statue. So the boss shot him.

Then came Jaggi. As he opened his mouth to tell the joke, Santa suddenly burst into laughter. Everyone was puzzled. Santa was laughing madly.

The boss asked him, "Why the hell are you laughing without hearing the joke?"

Santa said laughing and giggling, "Oh! How funny Banta's joke was!"

-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Fried Eggs

A wife was making a breakfast of fried eggs for her husband.

Suddenly, her husband burst into the kitchen.

"Careful," he said, "CAREFUL! Put in some more butter! Oh my GOD! You're cooking too many at once. TOO MANY! Turn them! TURN THEM NOW! We need more butter. Oh my GOD! WHERE are we going to get MORE BUTTER? They're going to STICK! Careful . CAREFUL! I said be CAREFUL! You NEVER listen to me when you're cooking! Never! Turn them! Hurry up! Are you CRAZY? Have you LOST your mind? Don't forget to salt them. You know you always forget to salt them. Use the salt. USE THE SALT! THE SALT!"

The wife stared at him, "What in the world is wrong with you? You think I don't know how to fry a couple of eggs?"

The husband calmly replied, "I just wanted to show you what it feels like when I'm driving."

-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
A Proud Indian

A first grade teacher explains to her class that she is an American. She asks her students to raise their hands if they were American too. Not really knowing why but wanting to be like their teacher, their hands explode into the air like flashy fireworks.

There is, however, one exception.

A girl named Gita has not gone along with the crowd.

The teacher asks her why she has decided to be different. "Because I am not an American." replied Gita.

"Then", asks the teacher, "What are you?"

"I'm a proud Indian," boasts the little girl.

The teacher is a little perturbed now, her face slightly red. She asks Gita why she is an Indian.

"Well", my mom and dad are Indians, "so I'm an Indian too."

The teacher is now angry.

"That's no reason", she says loudly, "if your mom was an idiot, and your dad was an idiot, what would you be then?"

A pause, and a smile.

"Then," says Gita, "I'd be an American."

source:santabanta.com

Jokes Today

Two eggs sitting on a kitchen table.

One of them spots a whisk and asks: "What's that?"

The other egg looks puzzled and replies: "Beats me"
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Q: What do pilots eat?

A: Plane biscuits.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
A trucker who has been out on the road for two weeks stops at a brothel outside Atlanta.

He walks straight up to the Madam, drops down £500 and says: "I want your ugliest woman and a grilled cheese sandwich!"

The Madam is astonished. "But sir, for that kind of money you could have one of my finest ladies and a three-course meal."

The trucker replies: "Listen darlin', I'm not horny - I'm homesick."

Celebrating Of Love

The ABC's of Celebrating Love!

A~~Absolutely amaze your partner with adoration. Let them know in very special ways that you care. Exercise extravagant respect and devotion toward your lover. Accept them for who they are. Demonstrate your warm attachment and affection to them. Avoid taking your partner for granted.

B~~Believe in your instincts. Be spontaneous. Don't plan. . . just do something that you've wanted to do with your partner for a long time. Let your love occur naturally. Stop and pick a roadside flower and present it to your partner.

C~~Cuddle. Lie close and be cozy. Do spoons! Just hold each other. There is a very special healing power in a close, warm embrace. C is also for "considerate."

D~~Discover new ways of expressing your love for each other. Hire a skywriter. Put a message up on a billboard. Buy a radio commercial to say I love you. Record a special message on a cassette.

E~~Entice your lover to try a new way of making love. Always making love the same way can bring on boredom. Focus on pleasure. Enjoy each other to the fullest. Read, Red Hot LoveNotes for Lovers.

This MaKe EvErY oNe To HaPpY & EnJoYiNg

Kids Jokes

Why are fish never good tennis players?
*They don't like getting close to the net.

What do you take off last before getting into bed?
*Your feet off the floor.

Why is a baseball game like a pancake?
*Because they both depend on the batter.

Why does a ballerina wear a tutu?
*Because one-one's too small and three-three's too big.

How does the ocean say hello to the sand?
*It waves.

Dost Mera Pran

* Dosti Shayari
Dosti toh sirf ek ittefaaq hai,
Yeh toh dilon ki mulaakaat hai,
Dosti nahi dekhti yeh din hai ki raat hai,
Isme toh sirf wafaadaari aur jasbaat hai !

* Dost ek saahil hai tufaano ke liye,
Dost ek aaina hai armaano ke liye,
Dost ek mehfil hai anjaano ke liye,
Dosti ek khawaahish hai aap jaise dost ko paane ke liye !!

Sardarji Jokes

(1) A sardar was very fond of sensational and detective novels, but he
always started reading from the middle. A friend of his asked why he
did so?” It’z doubly interesting”, said the Sardar. “To start from the
middle keeps one curious not only about its conclusion but also about its
beginning.

(2) A sardar invested 2 Lakhs in a business and Suffered huge Loss. Do u know what the business was? ………….. He opened a Saloon in Punjab!

(3) A sardarji photographer focusing a dead body’s face in a funeral function, suddenly all relatives beat him why? He said “SMILE PLEASE”

(4) Sardarji gets ready, wears tie, coat, […]

(5) Sardar Ji calls Air India.
“How long does it take to fly to Amritsar?”
“Just a sec,” says the rep.
Thank you.” says the Sardar ji and hangs up.

Love Thoughts

* Once in awhile,
Right in the middle of an ordinary life,
Love gives us a fairy tale.

* True poets don't write
Their thoughts with a pen...
They release the ink that flows
From within their heart.

* The only things in life you regret,
Are the risks that you didn't take.

* You love simply because you cannot help it.

* The greatest healing therapy is friendship and love.

Cartoons

* “I'm one of the boys, no better than the last second violinist. I'm just the lucky one to be standing in the center, telling them how to play.”

Eugene Ormandy quotes

* “One year they wanted to make me poster boy - for birth control”

* “The people in the village were real poor, so none of the children had any toys. But this one little boy had gotten an old enema bag and filled it with rocks, and he would go around and whap the other children across the face with it. Man, I think my heart almost broke. Later the boy came up and offered to give me the toy. This was too much! I reached out my hand, but then he ran away. I chased him down and took the enema bag. He cried a little, but that's the way of these people.”
dmg

Jack Handy quotes (American Writer)

Waiting For her love

Shakunthala Waiting For her love Dushyanthan Raja Ravi Varma Oil Paintings


source:Shakunthala Waiting For her love Dushyanthan Raja Ravi Varma Oil Paintings

Love Poems

* "Mysterious love, uncertain treasure
Hast thou more of pain or pleasure..........
Endless torments dwell about thee.
"Yet who would live, and live without thee!

* "......Good shephered, tell this youth what is to love.
It is to be all made of sighs and tears...
It is to be all made of faith and service....
It is to be all made of fantasy,
All made of passion and all made of wishes
All adoration, duty, and observance,
All humbleness, all patience and impatience,
All purity, all trial, all observance".

Animal Quotes-Tiger Quotes

* “God made the cat so that man might have the pleasure of caressing the tiger”

* “When a man wants to murder a tiger, it's called sport; when the tiger wants to murder him it's called ferocity.”

-George Bernard Shaw

* “He who rides a tiger is afraid to dismount.”

-Chinese quotes

* “I see no reason why Tiger Woods won't become a great player. Man, can he smoke some shots. A little refinement on Tiger's short game and there'll be nothing. He's already pretty darn imposing.”

-Corey Pavin

Kids Quotes

"In every child who is born, no matter what circumstances, and of no matter what parents, the potentiality of the human race is born again: and in him, too, once more, and of each of us, our terrific responsibility toward human life; toward the utmost idea of goodness, of the horror of terror, and of God."

Love Quotes

* Hatred comes from the heart; contempt from the head; & neither feeling is quite within our control.

- Arthur Schoperhauer

* I will permit no man to narrow and degrade my soul by making me hate him

- Booker T. Washington

* Hating people is like burning down your own house to get rid of a rat.

- Harry Emerson Fosdick

* Hating people is like burning down your house to kill a rat

- Henry Fosdick

* Nothing Brings People together more, then mutual hatred

- Henry Rollins

Sardarji Jokes

A Sardarji, very proud of his humour used to say to his wife leaving for the office : 'Good bye Char Bacchon ki Maa' . One day his wife fed up of this answered : ' Bye Bye, Doo Bacchon Ke Baap'. That ended the husband's witticisms.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Avtar & Kartar used to stay in same building . Avtar on the Ground floor & Kartar on the 25thfloor. One day when the lift was not working, Kartar invited Avtar for a Dinner. Avtar trudged up to 25th floor to find Kartar's flat closed from outside and had a note which read : 'How did you enjoy your dinner ? ' Not to be outdone , Avtar wrote under it, 'Sorry , I could not make it .'

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

'Take me to the 10th floor,' said Banta Singh as he entered the lift of a high rise bulding. When the lift reached its destination, the liftman opened its gates and said, 'The 10th floor, beta.' 'Why did you call me beta?' demanded Banta Singh. D'I am not your son.' I called you beta because I brought you up,' replied the liftman.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

The collector asked Banta Singh for his rail ticket. Banta Singh searched his pockets but could not find it. 'Never mind,' reassured the collector, ' I will take your word that you bought your ticket.' 'That is very kind of you,' replied Banta Singh,'but if I don't find it, I want to know where to get off.'

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Santa Singh : 'Look Banta, what type of glasses they have made. The top is closed. How can you fill lassi in it ?' Banta Singh : 'Yes, that's funny. And even if you make a hole at the top, how will the lassi stay in the glass when the bottom is open?'

Tiger Jokes and Humour

Two tigers are stalking through the undergrowth in single file when the one to the rear reaches out with his tongue and licks the bottom of the tiger in front. The startled tiger turns around and says, "Hey! Cut it out, all right!"

The rear tiger says, "sorry," and they continue. After about another five minutes, the rear tiger again reaches out with his tongue and licks the bottom of the tiger in front. The front tiger turns around and cuffs the rear tiger and says, "I said stop it!"

The rear tiger says, "sorry," and they continue. After about another five minutes, the rear tiger once more licks the bottom of the tiger in front. The front tiger turns around and asks the rear tiger, "What is it with you, anyway?"

The rear tiger replies, "Well, I just ate a lawyer and I'm trying to get the taste out of my mouth!"

Animal Jokes

* To find a truly great friend, you have to keep one eye closed - to keep him, two.

* True friends are those who are there for you unconditionally. Never do they question, but always offer support no matter what the circumstances are. Best Friends are the people worth living for.

* Side by side or miles apart, dear friends are always close to the heart.

* A best friend is somebody who knows every last thing about you, yet still manages to like you anyway.

* Most people enjoy the inferiority of their best friends.

Love Quotes

"LOVE IS FRIENDSHIP SET ON FIRE."

Love Quotes

* "One word frees us of all the weight and pain of life: That word is love."

* "Attention is the most basic form of love; through it we bless and are blessed."

* "We love because it's the only true adventure."

* "Love is like quicksilver in the hand.

Love Quotes

1. Love doesn't make the world go round. Love is what makes the ride worthwhile.
Franklin P. Jones

2. At the touch of love everyone becomes a poet.
Plato

3. Love is an irresistible desire to be irresistibly desired.
Robert Frost

4. If you have it [Love], you don't need to have anything else, and if you don't have it, it doesn't matter much what else you have.
Sir James M. Barrie

5. Love is the triumph of imagination over intelligence.
Henry Louis Mencken

6. Love is a friendship set to music.
E. Joseph Cossman

7. True love comes quietly, without banners or flashing lights. If you hear bells, get your ears checked.
Erich Segal

8. Love is a canvas furnished by Nature and embroidered by imagination.
Voltaire

9. They do not love that do not show their love. The course of true love never did run smooth. Love is a familiar. Love is a devil. There is no evil angel but Love.
William Shakespeare

10. Like the measles, love is most dangerous when it comes late in life.
Lord Byron

Friends To Sms

i love you ...

but am not your lover.

I care for you...

but am not from your family ....

I am ready to share your pain...

but am not in your blood relation.

I am your.......

F R I E N D !!!!!
-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
True friend scolds like a DAD....
Cares like a MOM....
Teases like a SISTER...
Irritates like a BROTHER...
and finally loves U more than a LOVER...
--------------------------------------------------------
☻Friendship improves happiness and abates misery, by the doubling of our joy and the dividing of our grief.

☻There is no distance too far between best friends, for friendship gives wings to the heart.

☻There is no friendship, no love, like that of the parent for the child.
--------------------------------------------------------------------

Joke Short Stories

Joke:1

Bill Gates dies in a car accident. He finds himself in purgatory, being sized up by St. Peter.

"Well, Bill, I'm really confused on this call; I'm not sure whether to send you to Heaven or Hell. After all, you enormously helped society by putting a computer in almost every home in America, yet you also created that ghastly Windows '95. I'm going to do something I've never done before in your case; I'm going to let you decide where you want to go."
So Bill went to Hell. It was a beautiful, clean, sandy beach with clear waters and lots of bikini-clad women running around, playing in the water, laughing and frolicking about.The sun was shining; the temperature perfect.

Bill replied, "well, what's the difference between the two?"

St. Peter said, "I'm willing to let you visit both places briefly, if it will help your decision."

"Fine, but where should I go first?"

"I'll leave that up to you."

"Okay then," said Bill, "Let's try Hell first."

So Bill went to Hell. It was a beautiful, clean, sandy beach with clear waters and lots of bikini-clad women running around, playing in the water, laughing and frolicking about.The sun was shining; the temperature perfect. He was very pleased.

"This is great!" he told St. Peter. "If this is hell, I REALLY want to see heaven!"

"Fine," said St. Peter, and off they went.

Heaven was a place high in the clouds, with angels drifting about, playing harps and singing. It was nice, but not as enticing as Hell.

Bill thought for a quick minute, and rendered his decision.

"Hmmm. I think I'd prefer Hell," he told St. Peter.

"Fine," retorted St. Peter, "as you desire."

So Bill Gates went to Hell.

Two weeks later, St. Peter decided to check on the late billionaire to see how he was doing in Hell. When he got there, he found Bill, shackled to a wall, screaming amongst hot flames in dark caves, being burned and tortured by demons.

"How's everything going?" he asked Bill.

Bill responded, with his voice filled with anguish and disappointment, "This is awful! This is nothing like the Hell I visited two weeks ago! I can't believe this is happening! What happened to that other place, with the beautiful beaches, the scantily-clad women playing in the water?!???"

"That was the demo," replied St. Peter.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Joke 2 :

A Paki, Bangladeshi and an INDIAN are in a bar one night having a beer.

The Paki drinks his beer and suddenly throws his glass in the air,pulls out a gun and shoots the glass to pieces. He says "In Islamabad our glasses are so cheap that we don't need to drink from the same one twice."

The Bangladeshi [obviously impressed by this] drinks his beer,throws his glass into the air, pulls out his gun and shoots the glass to pieces. He says "In Daka we have so much sand to make the glasses that we don't need to drink out of the same glass twice either."

The Indian, cool as a cucumber, picks up his beer and drinks it,throws his glass into the air, pulls out his gun and shoots the Paki and Bangladeshi. He says "In Delhi we have so many Paki and Bangladeshi that we don't need to drink with the same ones twice."

Jai Hind.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Joke:3

Wayward bird brings Winfrey down to earth!

Talkshow queen Oprah Winfrey was brought down to earth by a bird, when her private jet was forced to return to the Santa Barbara, California airport on Monday, after it collided with it, cracking the aircraft's windshield.

After spending Christmas at her 42-acre seaside mansion in nearby Montecito, the TV titan and her longtime beau Stedman Graham boarded her Gulfstream jet to fly to the East Coast, but were forced to make an emergency landing.

'This is not an unusual thing. We see these things pretty frequently,' E!Online quoted Santa Barbara Fire Department spokesman John Ahlman, as saying.

Sardarji Jokes

Sugar Test:

Sardar enters kitchen, opens sugar box, looks inside and closes it. This he does again and again. Why?

Because the doctor told him to check sugar regularly
---------------------------------------------------------
Apple in a Mango Tree:

Sardar climbed a tree. Monkey asked: "Too uper kyon aaya?"

Sardar: "Apple Khane"

Monkey: "Yeh to mango tree"

Sardar: "Idiot, apple saath laaya hoon"
-----------------------------------------------------
Sardars and scooter:

Three Sardars were going on a scooter. Traffic police showed them his hand. One of the Sardars told: We are already three, sorry, there is no space
--------------------------------------------------------
Lion and Sardars:

Two Sardars were in a forest, when a lion came roaring towards them. One of them throws sand into its eyes, and runs. Second one stays unmoved. When asked why he is not running, another Sardar tells: "Why should I be running? It is you who has thrown the sand "
---------------------------------------------------------
Cyclone:

Bank manager asks Sardar in an interview: "What is cyclone"

Sardar: "It is the loan given to purchase a cycle"
----------------------------------------------------------------
Side Effects:

Once Sardar brought some tablets and started cutting the edges. Do you know why? He wanted to avoid side effects!