I offer you peace. I offer you love. I offer you friendship. I see your beauty. I hear your need. I feel your feelings My wisdom flows from the Highest Source. I salute that Source in you. Let us work together for unity and love.
--Mahatma Gandhi
| [+/-] |
Sardarji Jokes..... |

Did you hear about the sardarji who is so rich he
has two swimming pools, one of which is always empty?
It's for people who can't swim!
*********************************************************************
Sardar1:- Marte Waqt Aadmi Ko Kya Dena Chahiye?
Sardar2:-Birla cement
Sardar1:-Kyun?
Sardar2:- Kyunki Is Cement Mein Jaan Hain
******************************************************************
Once a sardar calls another sardar on the phone
and says "Hi, Main Bol Raha Hoon". The other sardar replies
"Kamaal Hain, Ithe Vi Main Bol Raha Hoon se !"
******************************************************************
A sardar was drawing money from ATM. The sardar
behind him in the
line said, "Ha! Ha! Haaa! I've seen ur password.
Its 4 asterisks(****).
The first sardar replies, " Ha! Ha! Haaa! U r
wrong. Its 1258."
| [+/-] |
Love Shayaris |

YOU ARE
As innocent as a flower
As sweet as cherry pie
As beautiful as a sunset
As bright as a firefly
As clever as a musician
As romantic as a red rose
As genuine as a teardrop
As funny as a clown’s nose
As honest as a young child
As fun as a merry-go-round
As rare as a four leaf clover
As down-to-earth as the ground
As friendly as a butterfly
As precious as passing youth
As gorgeous as miss world is
As valuable as pure truth
Hope u like it!!
| [+/-] |
Aussie Cricket Captain Ricky Pointing Gets Kissed... |
| [+/-] |
It is all fun |

Age 2 Yrs..Nurse Ko ankh mare..
Age 3 Yrs..Uncle ki Cigarette lay kar bhagaa
Age 4 Yrs..ghar walon ki naak mein dum
Age 5 Yrs..Neighbours ki bell Baja ke bhagaaa..
Age 6 Yrs..school mein Teacher ko line mari..
Age 7 Yrs...exam mein cheating karni seekhi
Age 8 Yrs...Papa ki Pocket se Purse gayab...
Age 9 Yrs...Pirated cd's Ka dhaanda...
Age 10 Yrs...Papa Ki car Road pe..
Age 11 Yrs...Road waley apney apney Gharoon per..
Age 12 Yrs...raat ko subah, subah ko raat....
Age 13 Yrs...club jana shuru
Age 14 yrs...padosi ki beti Le kar Faraar...
Age 15 Yrs...Cigarettes ki duniya ka baadshah..
Age 16 Yrs...college mein admission
Age 17 Yrs...Whisky&Vodka ki dunya mein new name..
Age 18 yrs...ab shareef hogaya hooon!koi shrarat nahin karta
So NoW MAKe Me uR GD fRn.
| [+/-] |
Don't Miss... |

“One thing that stood out for all of us looking at the Indian team during the Twenty20 has been the amount of youthfulness they had in the team, giving it a nice fresh air,”
“It’s unfortunate that some of the younger guys who were in this team will be making way for the senior guys — Sachin Tendulkar, Rahul Dravid, Sourav Ganguly and Zaheer Khan. This could turn in our favour since we know these guys a lot deal better.
| [+/-] |
I Miss You..... |

I miss you each day in my life
I miss you each time you leave
I miss you each time you say good bye
I miss everything about you
I miss your smile and your laughter
I miss your tender touch of humor
I miss your gentleness and kindness
I miss you when you leave my sight
I miss you all the time
I miss you when you're so far away
I miss you with all my heart
I miss you in my thoughts
I miss you at my side
I miss looking at your eyes
I miss your kisses and your touch
I miss you so much
I miss you every moment
I miss you every day
I miss you so much....
| [+/-] |
Some Sardarji Jokes..... |
(1) ONE FINE DAY A GIRL PROPOSED TO A SARDAR AND SARDAR DENIED SIMPLY SAYING THAT IN OUR FAMILY,WE MARRY ONLY OUR RELATIVES MY MOM MARRIED MY DAD, MY BROTHER MARRIED MY BHABHI , MY UNCLE MARRIED MY AUNT AND SO ON. SO PLEASE EXCUSE ME !!!!!
(2) Sardarji calls Air India. 'How long does it take
to fly to Amritsar?'
'Just a sec,' says the customer service assistant.
'Thank you.' says the Sardarji and hangs up.
(3) Sardarji ( to doctor ) : Doctor, I have a problem.
Doctor : What's your problem?
Sardarji : I keep forgetting things.
Doctor : Since when do you have this problem?
(4) Santa Singh goes to a TV shop and asks, 'Aap ke
paas color TV hai kya?'
'Haan' replies shopowner.
Santa Singh says, 'Ek hara vala dena!'
Sardarji : What problem?
(5) Sardarji is trying to commit suicide on the railway tracks and he takes along some wine and chicken with him. Somebody stops him and asks "kyon bhai, ye sab kyon leke baithe ho?" Sardarji replies "Saali train late aati hai kahin bhook se na marjaun"
| [+/-] |
One More Way To Get A Divorce ! |
| [+/-] |
KIDS JOKES...... |
A little girl goes to see the doctor. She's got a pea in one nostril, a grape in the other, and a string bean stuck in her ear. She says to the doctor, "I don't feel good."
The doctor replies, "The problem is clear to me. You're not eating right!"
****************************************************
What is Santa's favourite candy?
Jolly Ranchers!
............................................................................................................
Why didn't the skeleton go to the dance?
Because he had no body to go with.
.................................................................................................................
What did the big telephone say to the small telephone?
"You're too small to be engaged!"
| [+/-] |
FUNNY SHORT STORIES..... |

A Man and His Dog
A man and his dog were walking along a road. The man was enjoying the scenery, when it suddenly occurred to him that he was dead. He remembered dying, and that his faithful dog had been dead for many years. He wondered where the road was leading them. After a while, they came to a high, white stone wall along one side of the road. It looked like fine marble. As he reached the wall, he saw a magnificent gate in the arch, and the street that led to the gate made from pure gold. He and the dog walked toward the gate, and as he got closer, he saw a man at a desk to one side.
When he was close enough, he called out, "Excuse me, where are we?"
"This is heaven, sir," the man answered.
"Wow! Would you happen to have some water? We have traveled far," the man said.
"Of course, sir. Come right in, and I'll have some ice water brought right up."
The man gestured, and the gate began to open.
"Can my friend," gesturing toward his dog, "come in, too?" the traveler asked.
"I'm sorry, sir, but we don't accept pets."
The man thought a moment, remembering all the years this dog remained loyal to him and then turned back toward the road and continued the way he had been going. After another long walk he came to a plain dirt road, which led through a farm gate that looked as if it had never been closed. There was no fence. As he approached the gate, he saw a man inside, leaning against a tree and reading a book.
"Excuse me!" he called to the reader. "Do you have any water? We have traveled far."
"Yes, sure, there's a faucet over there." The man pointed to a place that couldn't be seen from outside the gate. "Come on in and help yourself."
"How about my friend here?" the traveler gestured to his dog.
"There should be a bowl by the faucet; he is welcome to share."
They went through the gate, and sure enough, there was an old-fashioned faucet with a bowl beside it. The traveler filled the bowl and took a long drink himself, then he gave some to the dog. When they were full, he and the dog walked back toward the man who was standing by the tree waiting for them.
"What do you call this place?" the traveler asked.
"This is heaven," was the answer.
"Well, that's confusing," the traveler said. "The man down the road said that was heaven, too."
"Oh, you mean the place with the gold street and pearly gates? Nope. That's hell."
"Doesn't it make you mad for them to use your name like that?"
"No. We're just happy that they screen out the folks who'd leave their best friends behind in exchange for material things."
| [+/-] |
AUCTION IN BELGIUM.... |

Internet auction website eBay on Monday withdrew an unusual second-hand sale item, the country of Belgium, which had attracted an offer of 10 million euros (13.9 million dollars).
"Belgium, a kingdom in three parts" was posted on the Belgian ebay site as offering "plenty of choice" despite the caveat that it comes with "300 billion of National Debt."
Offered in three parts -- Flanders, Brussels and Wallonia -- the accompanying blurb said the kingdom "can be bought as a whole (not recommended)."
The vendor also included as added extras "the king and his court (costs not included)."
Ebay spokesman Peter Burin said the site could not host the sale of anything virtual or "unrealistic," the Belga news agency reported.
The 'vendor' was named as a former journalist, Gerrit Six. Offering his lot at an initial price of one euro, he saw 26 subsequent bids culminating in the 10 million euro offer on Monday before the auction was halted.
The spoof sale was offered while Belgium is mired in a political crisis which has led to discussion over the country's future as a federal state.
Tuesday marks 100 days since the country's general election with no sign of a coalition government being formed by the political parties in Dutch-speaking Flanders and French-speaking Wallonia.
According to the ebay spokesman, it wasn't the first time Belgium had been put up for sale.
"But the last time it wasn't a Belgian who made the announcement and it wasn't as well done or as amusing," said Burin.
| [+/-] |
LOVE SHAYARIS...... |

1. KAWAL HO TUM NAA GHULAAB HO TUM
MYRI ANKOH KA KHWAAB HO TUM
HAATH UTHA KE RAB SE JOH SAWAAL KIYA THAY
UN SAB SAWALO KE JAWAAB HO TUM!!
TUMSA KOI AUR IS ZAMEEN PE HUWA
TOH RABSE SHIKYAT HOGI
TUMHARI TARAF RUK KISI GAYR KA HUWA TOH KYAMAT SE PEHLAY KYAMAT HOGI
2. jab bhi tanhaayee se ghabraake simat jaate hai
Hum teri yaad ke daaman se lipat jaate hai
unpe thoofa ko bhi afsos hua karta hai
wo safine jo kinaro pe ulat jaate hai
Hum to aaye the rahe saaKh mei phoolo ki tarah
tum agar haar samajhte ho to ha jaate hai
Reply With Quote
3. tujhe chahne wale kum na honge,
waqt ke sath shayad hum na honge,
chahe kisi ko kitna bhi pyaar dena,
lekin teri yaadoN ke haqdar sirf hum hi hoNge
| [+/-] |
FUNNY NEWS...... |
COUPLE DIVORCE AFTER ONLINE 'AFFAIR'
A bosnian couple is getting divorced after finding out that they had been secretly chatting each other up online, using fake names. Sana Kiaric,27 and husband Adnan,32, from Zenica, revealed their marriage troubles to each other, and both felt they had found their real soul mate. The couple had met in an online chat forum while he was at work and she in an internet cafe, and started chatting under the names sweetie and prince of joy. The pair eventually decided to meet up-but there was no happy ending. Now they are both filling for divorce-with each accusing the other of being unfaithful.
************************************************************
| [+/-] |
LOVE SMS MESSAGES... |

| [+/-] |
|
(1) Ego-Boosters
* Live Your Life So That When You Die, the Preacher Will Not Have to Tell Lies at Your Funeral
(2) Pets Rule
* It's My Dog's World. I'm Just Here to Open Cans
* Cats Regard People As Warm-Blooded Furniture
(3) What's Your IQ?
* Suppose You Were an Idiot...And Suppose You Were a Member of Congress...But I Repeat Myself
* My Mind Works Like Lightning -- One Brilliant Flash and It's Gone
* God Must Love Stupid People -- He Made So Many
* I Have a Short Attention...
(4) Making It Big In This World
* I'm Destined for Greatness -- I'm Just Pacing Myself
* I've Gone to Find Myself. If I Get Back Before I've Found Me, Please Keep Me Here
(5) Bless Me, Father
* Protons Have Mass! And I Didn't Even Know They Were Catholic
* Heck Is Where People Go Who Don't Believe in Gosh
(6) Retirement
* Retirement -- Twice as Much Husband for Half as Much Money
* Retired -- I Was Tired Yesterday and I'm Tired Again Today
* My Back Goes Out More Than I Do
* Retired -- Know It All and Got Plenty of Time to Tell You About It
| [+/-] |
YOU ARE TIRED.... |
![]()
(1) Feeling Stressed?
* I Used to Have a Handle on Life, But It Broke
* Out of My Mind. Back in Five Minutes
* My Reality Check Just Bounced
* Cancel My Subscription -- I Don't Need Your Issues
* Dangerously Under-Medicated
* Madness Takes Its Toll -- Please Have Exact Change
(2) No Pain, No Gain
* Every Time I Hear the Dirty Word 'Exercise' I Wash My Mouth Out With Chocolate
* Physically Pffffft!
(3) It's One of Those Days
* Some Days You're the Pigeon, Some Days You're the Statue
* Earth Is the Insane Asylum for the Universe
* Life Is Short -- Make Fun of It
(4) Travel Fun
* Buckle Up. It Makes It Harder for the Aliens to Snatch You From Your Car
* I Took the Road Less Traveled, and Now Where the Heck Am I?
* Welcome to Tennessee -- Set Your Watch Back 20 Years
(5) Good Advice
* Use Vowels Every Day or You'll Get Consonated
* Don't Hate Yourself in the Morning -- Sleep Till Noon
| [+/-] |
SOME SPICY JOKES.... |

(1) Wear a Joke! Funniest T-Shirt Slogans
When it comes to broadcasting your philosophy of life, political opinions, or just a joke for the day, there's no better way than on a T-shirt. Just for grins and giggles, here are T-shirt slogans and sayings submitted by readers to Washington Post metro columnist Bob Levy:
(2) The Joy of Sex
* At My Age, Getting Lucky Is Finding My Car in the Parking Lot
* Remember When Sex Was Safe and Skydiving Was Dangerous?
(3) The Battle of the Sexes
* Men Are Like Grapes. If You Stomp on Them and Keep Them in the Dark Long Enough, They Might Turn Into Something That You Would Take to Dinner
* He Rules the Roost -- But I Rule the Rooster
* (On the front) Randolph-Macon Woman's College (On the back) Not a Girls' School with No Men, but a Women's College with No Boys
* Never Go to Bed Mad. Stay Up and Fight
(4) Parenting Pearls of Wisdom
* We Got Rid of the Kids -- The Cat Was Allergic
* Got Pickles? (on a maternity shirt)
* Don't Worry, Mom -- It's Just a Phase
* You Spend the First Two Years of Their Lives Teaching Them to Walk and Talk -- and the Next 16 Telling Them to Sit Down and Shut Up
(5) The Joy of Aging
* I'm Still Hot -- It Just Comes in Flashes
* I'm Not 50 -- I'm $49.95 Plus Tax
* I Know I Came Into This Room for a Reason
* Fifty Is the Ultimate F-Word
* Wrinkled Was Not One of the Things I Wanted to Be When I Grew Up
| [+/-] |
LOVE SMS MESSAGES.... |

1. I'd rather be hated for who I am then be loved for who I'm not
2. Trying to forget someone you loved is like trying to remember someone you never knew.
3. Dance like no one's watching; sing like no one's listening; love like you can't get hurt, and live like there's no tomorrow.
4. LoVe iS LiKe QuiCkSanD - ThE DeEpEr yOu FaLL iN iT ThE HaRdeR iT iS tO GeT OuT.
5. You showed me how it is to be loved. Now I know what really love is. 1 day we will be together forever. I can't wait to hold you in my arms again.
6. There's a warmth in my heart. It haunts me when U R gone. Mend me 2 ur side and never let go. The more I live The more I know, wat's simple is true, I love you.
7. I feel something in my heart, it's like a little flame, every time I see you, this flame lights up, this flame is special for you, because I LOVE YOU!
8. If love were to be taxed, I would be the highest tax payer, you can't buy Love... but you can pay heavily.
9. Common sense is common, but... the use of common sense is uncommon !!!!
10. Promises are like babies, easy to give hard to deliver.
| [+/-] |
BAPU CARTOONS (BUDUGU) |
BAPU most well-known cartoon strip, called Budugu, was the result of a collaboration with his childhood friend, Mullapudi Venkataramana, and gave life to Mullapudi's characters Budugu and his family in the form of pictures.The cartoon strip is about a lovable, precocious little boy-next-door called Budugu.
| [+/-] |
LOVE SMS. MESSAGES.. |

(1) Love is like a cloud... love is like a dream... love is 1 word and everything in between... love is a fairytale come true... Coz I found love when I found U.
(2) It hurts to love someone and not be loved in return, but what hurts more is to love someone, and never find the courage to let them know how you feel.
(3) It takes a minute to have a crush, an hour to like someone, and a day to love someone, but it takes a lifetime to forget someone.
(4) I'm scared to fall in love, scared to fall fast, because every time I fall in love... it never seems to last.
(5) People say you only fall in love once, but when I hear your voice I fall in love all over again
(6) There are times when I fall in love with someone new, but I always seem to find myself back in love with you.
(7) The hardest thing you'll ever do is watch the one u love, love someone else.
(8) Meeting you was fate, becoming your friend was choice, but falling in love with you was completely out of my control.
(9) Always draw a circle around the ones you love, never draw a heart because hearts can be broken, but circles are never ending.
(10) Love is to think about someone else more times in a day than you think about yourself.
| [+/-] |
T-SHIRT QUOTES.... |

* I Childproofed My House, But They Still Get In!
* I'm Not a Snob. I'm Just Better Than You Are
* (On the front) 60 Is Not Old . . . (On the back) If You're a Tree
* Before You Can Be Old and Wise, You Must First Be Young and Stupid
* I Need Somebody Bad. Are You Somebody Bad?
* My Wife Comes With Instructions -- Lots of Instructions
* I Was God's Gift to Women, But I Have Been Rewrapped and Placed on a Closet Shelf
* Hang Up and Drive
* If You Think Nobody Cares, Try Missing a Couple of Payments
* A Dog's Parents Never Visit
| [+/-] |
SMS TO FRIENDS..... |
(1) Friends are like stars…you do not always see them but you know they are always there!
(2) I realised today our friendship means so much to me that if we were the last in a sinking ship & we have only one life jacket I'll....hmmmmm..... MISS U YAAR.
(3) People Fall in luv not knowing why or how. It's so special a feeling that it doesn't require much answers. U just luv no matter how stupid u become.
(4) If anyone ever asked me, what the statement, "Life Is Beautiful" meant to me, I'd just put my hand around your shoulder, hold you close to me and say "This is it".
(5) Friendship requires little effort... Even when friends are busy with their own lives, a simple sms reminds each other that u r not forgotten.
(6) Friends are amazing when they are new, they are wonderful when they are true, but they are a "Blessing" when they are like U.
(7) Friends change, I know they do, but this friend will always belongs to you. Friends hurt, I know they do, but this friend gets hurt more without U.
(8) Friendship is when you have had a huge fight, deciding once for all... 'That's it', but then you decide to put aside your egos, hold hands & say, "I Need U..."
(9) lf you get less messages from me, don't think that l didn't care for you, but l'm searching for the best message for a best person like you!
(10) Without humor, life sux. Without courage, life is hard. Without love, life is hopeless. Without friends like you, life is impossible!
| [+/-] |
POLITICAL JOKES |

Three men , a Canadian, Osama Bin Ladin and President
Bush are out walking together one day. They come across
a lantern and a Genie pops out of it.
"I will give each of you one wish, that's three wishes
total," says the Genie.
The Canadian says, "I am a farmer, my dad was a
farmer, and my son will also farm. I want the land
to be forever fertile in Canada.
With a blink of the Genie's eye, 'POOF' the land in
Canada was forever made fertile for farming.
Osama Bin Ladin was amazed, so he said, "I want a wall
around Afghanistan, so that no infidels and Jews can come
into our precious state."
Again, with a blink of the Genie's eye, 'POOF' there
was a huge wall around Afghanistan.
President Bush, asks, "I'm very curious. Please tell
me more about this wall."
The Genie explains, "Well, it's about 15,000 feet high,
500 feet thick and completely surrounds the country;
nothing can get in or out---virtually impenetrable."
President Bush says, "Very impressive. Fill it with water."
| [+/-] |
LOVE SMS MESSAGES.... |

(1) True love is like ghosts, which everybody talks about and few have seen.
(2) Without humor, life sux. Without courage, life is hard. Without love, life is hopeless. Without friends like you, life is impossible!
(3) FiRsT NiTe, FiRsT SiGhT, I SaW, I KnEw, LoVe's SwEEtEr ThAn MoUnTaiN DeW, A pRoMiSe I mAdE and' WiLL kEEp, 2 LoVe YOU aLwAys~
(4) LovE is Not HoW LonG U've BeeN 2gEthEr; nOt HoW MucH U've GIvEn oR RecEivE; Not hOw MaNy TimEs U've HeLpEd EaCh OthEr --- Its HoW U VALUE EaCh OtHEr...
(5) I håtê Smî|îÑg jûSt tO prEtêñD î'M ñOt hUrt. î hÅtE to gîGglê tO Show î'll ßê okåY. î hAtE tO laUgh aFtEr î Cry. í Stìll lovE YOU ßût í'Vé tó SaY gooDbYê...
(6) Don't regret what you've did, but regret what you never did, go and say 'I LOVE U' to your loved one!
(7) Love makes life so confusing but without love would you want to live?
(8) Love Is When You Don't Want To Go To Sleep, Because Reality Is Better Than A Dream.
(9) WOrLd iS cRueL, LoVe iS bLinD. LoSt iN sAdnEsS, BluR In miND. HeArT iS bRoKeN, fLaMe hAd DiEd. TiMe HaS pAsSeD bUt wHy iS hE... sTiLL nOt mInE...
(10) No one is too young for love, because love doesn't come from your mind, which knows your age, but from your heart, which knows no age.
| [+/-] |
FUN DOG QUOTES...... |

(1) When a man's best friend is his dog, that dog has a problem."
-- Edward Abbey
(2) "The reason a dog has so many friends is that he wags his tail instead of his tongue."
--Anonymous
(3) "Dogs feel very strongly that they should always go with you in the car, in case the need should arise for them to bark violently at nothing right in your ear."
-- Dave Barry
(4) "Dogs need to sniff the ground; it's how they keep abreast of current events. The ground is a giant dog newspaper, containing all kinds of late-breaking dog news items, which, if they are especially urgent, are often continued in the next yard."
--Dave Barry
(5) "A dog teaches a boy fidelity, perseverance, and to turn around three times before lying down."
-- Robert Benchley
| [+/-] |
LOVE SMS.... |
![]()
My eyes Miss U, My Feeling Love U,
My eyes Miss U, My Feeling Love U, My hand Need U, My Mind Call U, My heart just 4 U. I will Die without U, Bcoz I Love U.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Do u know whats the meaning of FAMILY?
Do u know whats the meaning of FAMILY? F=father A=and M=mother I=i L=love Y=you
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Simple Bye makes us cry,
Simple Bye makes us cry,
Simple joke makes us Laugh,
Simple care makes us fall in Luv,
Simple Touch makes us feel better,
But i hope my simple MSG makes u smile!
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
If you live to be a hundred
If you live to be a hundred , I want to be a hundred minus one day , so I don’t have to live a day without you…
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Roses of red grow in my heart
Roses of red grow in my heart and they will never wither… ‘Cause they bloom every time I see your smile, hear your voice or just think of you!
| [+/-] |
LOVE SHAYARIS.... |

Khushboo teri yaari di saanu mehka jaandi hai,teri har ik kitti hoyi
gal saanu behka jaandi hai,saah taan bahut der lagaande ne aun -jaan
vich,har saah ton pehle teri yaad aa jaandi hai
***********************************
Ibaadat rabb di te chehra yaar da howe,sajde khuda di te rasam pyaar
di howe,aashiqaan de mazhab di ki dassiye,zikar rabb da te gal dildaar
di howe.
***************************************
Je Saadi Nahin c Tu ho Sakna ,
Kaahnu Pyaar Enna Fer Payeya c
Je Inj hi Rulaana c Varne ,
Kahano Saanu Fer Tu hasaya c
| [+/-] |
LOVE SMS MESSAGES.... |
| [+/-] |
JOKE SHORT STORIES |

OK, two can play at this game:
A guy's dog had been acting listless, so he takes it into the vet for a
checkup.
The vet puts the dog on the table, examines it, and then tells the guy
"I'm sorry, sir, but your dog is dead".
"What???" says the guy. "I want a second opinion".
So the vet goes into a back room and brings out a cat in a cage. He
opens the cage door, and the cat walks out, sniffs the dog from head to
toe, then walks back into the cage. "That'll be $250" sez the vet.
"250???" the guy exclaims. "For what???"
"$50 for my exam", says the vet, "and $200 for the cat-scan
......................................................
Some friars were behind in their belfry payments, so they opened a small florist shop to raise the funds. Since everyone liked to buy flowers from the men of God, the rival florist across town thought the competition was unfair.
He asked the good fathers to close down, but they would not. He went back and begged the friars to close. They ignored him. He asked his mother to go ask the friars to get out of business. They ignored her. So, the rival florist hired Hugh Mac Taggart, the roughest and most vicious thug in town to "persuade" them to close. Hugh beat up the friars and trashed their store, saying he'd be back if they didn't close shop. Terrified, the friars did so.
The Moral of the Story: Wait for it....
| [+/-] |
ALERT PARENTS... |

--- KIDS' INSTRUCTIONS ON LIFE ---
(1) Don't ever be too full for dessert.
(2) When your dad is mad and asks you, "Do I look stupid?" don't answer him.
(3) Never tell your mom her diet's not working.
(4) Don't pick on your sister when she's holding a baseball bat.
(5) When you get a bad grade in school, show it to your mom when she's on the phone. -
(6) Never try to baptize a cat.
(7) Never spit when on a roller coaster.
(8) Never do pranks at a police station.
(9) Beware of cafeteria food when it looks like it's moving.
(10) Never tell your little brother that you're not going to do what your mom told you to do.