JOKES TODAY: March 2009

Mar 31, 2009

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Mar 16, 2009

Seduction tips to your lady love

Here are some useful ways to get your lady hooked on to you as you gear up for a hot steamy session.

Woo your lady love

A man would love to have a sex-kitten in bed ready to woo him in all Seduction tips to woo your lady love exciting ways.

Descending his way to bed, he would expect his wild cat doing everything that ensures a gratifying session. But why just men have all the fun?

It’s high time they realise that even their partner needs to be aroused to feel the pleasure. After all, it’s a two way enjoyment that seeks equal participation from both the partners. Though enough has been said and heard about the ways to seduce a man but rarely does one steps up to woo a woman the way she likes it.

"Seduction is an art in itself and needs to be treated with a lot of care. Everyone prefers to be the ‘seduced’ rather than be the 'seducer'. The element of surprise is very important; getting the unexpected is a real turn on," says Dr Gitanjali Sharma, a relationship expert.

For a woman, a man's seduction skills are on test not just in bed but out of it too. So, all men out there – master the art of seduction that goes beyond the usual gesture of hugs and kisses.

Here are some useful ways to get your lady hooked on to you as you gear up for a hot steamy session...

Blindfold the beauty : Women love surprises, which indeed is the biggest turn on for them. The perfect way to seduce a woman is to blindfold her and let the passion heat build on. The surprise factor works wonders and of course, makes the job easier for men. During these moments, treat her with different tastes, different fragrances and different texture to heighten her senses! A casual rub up her arm close to her bossom or back may give her a different high but make sure to keep her blindfolded till the time she gets crazy.

Caution : Dr. Devesh Roy, a sex therapist adds, “Make an effort to know your partner’s trigger zones. Since most women are hesitant when it comes to undressing, a blindfold can be really helpful, as it comforts her in the best possible way. And what more, you can take advantage and get a bit naughty by touching her at the right spots.”

Truth or dare : This game may appear to be a slow verbal foreplay but it can do wonders. Women are usually less experimental or daring when it comes to trying out different techniques to seduce their man. But men can think out-of-the-box to woo their partner. Truth or dare, it can be a win-win situation for you. If it's truth, ask her something sexual and if it’s a dare then ask her to do something naughty. If she reciprocates the game in a way you want, then you’ve already won the game. This game in itself is super naughty and when played in the right mood becomes very sensual.

Caution : Remember your woman wants to test all your moods – from being romantic, naughty to a bit dirty and finally sexually aroused. Do not portray yourself as if you are hungry for sex. Keep your sexual gestures understated and during such a game, don’t expect her to do whatever you ask for! Be considerate towards her comfort zone and accordingly set the sexual mood,” warns Dr. Amita Mishra, sex and relationship expert.

Talk dirty : Bringing sexual elements into a conversation is a gateway towards actually doing it. Women might feel reluctant to Seduction tips to woo your lady love include this in their list of seduction techniques, but a man can surely set the mood right for a sexually intimate discussion. Just bring up sex in a conversation in a general manner. For instance, talk about erotic scenes from different movies. As the conversation progresses, open up with her a little more and ask if she would like to act like that. Now once you’ve discussed sex openly, you can start working on your physical contact and then take things to the next level.

Caution : “Make sure that you don’t sound obscene or vulgar because that might turn off your woman. Keeping the conversation sexually inclined; try to retain the romantic element throughout, as it acts like a magic spell to arouse a woman,” suggests Dr. Kirti Mishra, a clinical physiologist and a relationship expert.

Taking on role-play : Men always expect their woman to seduce them by taking on role play. Be it of a nurse, a wild tigress or a porn star – role-playing has always played a crucial role during seduction moments. So, men too can make the most of it by enacting a character to seduce the girl. Now, it could be as wild as Tarzan or as superficial as a Superman. Just make sure it has all the elements to take your woman into a different world.

Caution : “Role-playing can go wrong at times, if your woman dislikes a particular character. So beware of her likes and dislikes. Don’t keep the role-play boring, involve her as well. Take her on a fantasy trip. Share your fantasies and tempt her in a manner that she cannot resist getting into some steamy action,” says Dr. Roy.

Sensuous cooking : Try this role reversal for a day and look for yourself how it works. A man who knows cooking is one thing but a man who cooks for his lady love is another. Display your culinary skills and cook something really special and exciting, of course of her choice! Adding ingredients with aphrodisiacal qualities will certainly be an add-on. Whatever you cook, don’t forget to sprinkle it with love, add a pinch of naughtiness, garnish it with romance and arrange for an exotic dining experience just for her.

Caution : “Simply cooking a few dishes can’t arouse your woman, so present her in a way that conveys a message to her. Make her feel special and let her know that you tried it all only for her love and affection. During the special dinner, serve her and keep expressing your desires that hints towards a night of passion,” advices Amita.

Texting love : Texting is easier than saying it out loud. And dirty texting is indeed the magic mantra to woo her. Get wild with your imagination and let your words do the talking for you. You should be at your confident best while your are texting and chances are that your oops can turn to a good move for you.

Caution : “Know exactly what turns her on – romantic messages or a bit dirty ones and play your wild cards accordingly. If she responds well and hints that she’s also charged for a romp, you better know what lies next! Don’t delay it further by wasting time to ask her out, just invite her comfortably and let love take over the rest,” says Dr. Kirti.

Fun unlimited : It’s official. Women like ‘funny men’ with a good sense of humour. Now it’s up to a man how he uses this humour to seduce his lady love. While dirty talking and sensual gestures can surely set the mood right, what matters the most are those little things that make your woman feel wanted. Crack jokes or kinky yet funny comments and as she splits into laughter, give her a pat or touch her hands in a happy gesture. Such humorous moments coupled with a physical touch is a modest way to seduce a woman.

Caution : “A woman may seem least interested in your humour and if that’s the case, recall some funny incidents that you had together. And if she is equally enjoying the rib tickling moments with you, then touch her tenderly and whisper words in her ears to keep up the physical contact. It can turn out to be a great seduction technique,” feels Dr. Roy.

source:timesofindia.com

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Bollywood stars play Holi

Mar 10, 2009

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Homemade Holi Tips

Go organic this Holi colours!

Raid your kitchen to conjure up some homemade Holicolours! Go organic this Holi Experts say these colours can harm our skin, hair and can cause respiratory problems too.

Holi is synonymous with smiles, gaiety and colours. However, the chemicals
used in coours can be a dampener on spirits.

Experts say these colours can harm our skin, hair and can cause respiratory problems too. Many people suffer from skin and eye allergies because of these chemicals.

Health hazards of Holi colours

Different kinds of chemicals, which can prove harmful, are used to produce Holi colours.

Green : The copper sulphate used can cause temporary blindness
and eye allergies.

Silver : It may include aluminium bromide, a carcinogenic or agent involved in causing cancer.

Red : Your favourite gulal may contain mercury sulphite, which can cause skin cancer, mental retardation or paralysis.

Purple : It may contain chromium iodide that can lead to various allergies and asthma.

Staying indoors on this festival of cheer is not a great idea. Instead, doctors suggest playing Holi with organic colours. Many stores now offer these natural colours.

In fact, making these colours at home is also an easy, intelligent and fun option. So here a few tips to help you prepare for an ‘Organic Holi’.

Yellow: Say it with flowers!
Turmeric (haldi) and gram flour (besan) are an important part of our homemade face packs. You can mix both to create the colour yellow. You can substitute gram flour with talcum powder or fuller’s earth (multani mitti) too.

You can also dry flowers like marigold (gainda) or yellow chrysanthemums and crush them to a fine powder. Then, mix this powder with gram flour.

Red: Ek chutki sindoor!
Red seems to be everybody’s favorite colour on Holi. This year rather than smearing gulal on others, wish your friends with an amazing colour made of red sandalwood powder, which is very good for the skin too. Apart from that, you can use sindoor as well. Powder dry red hibiscus flowers and use them as gulal. You can also soak these flowers in water overnight to get wet colour.

Saffron: Ummm... smells good!
It’s said that Lord Krishna played Holi with tesu flowers, known as the Flame of the Forest (butea monosperma). You can either boil these flowers or soak them overnight to obtain a nice smelling orange colour.

You can also crush these dried tesu flowers to a powder, and then mix with sandalwood powder. It smells great and gives a very smooth touch.

Green: Beauty on duty!
You can use henna powder (mehndi), mixed with any suitable flour to attain a lovely green shade. Mehndi only leaves behind its colour when it’s wet and dry mehndi can be brushed off very easily. Those who love putting colour on people’s hair, do it with henna and save everyone a parlour visit too!

Leaves of gulmohur (delonix regia) can also be dried and powdered to attain a fine green colour.

Pink: The wet look!
For a wet pink, slice a few beetroots and soak them overnight in water or boil for a few minutes.

Black: Colour-cum-conditioner
You can boil gooseberries (fruits of amla) in an iron container for a few minutes and then keep it aside for a while. Dilute it with water and use. It also works as a conditioner!

Make a pact to go organic this Holi. You’ll be surprised at how much people welcome the colours and you. So, play Holi the natural way!

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Casual sex Feel good factor

Does sex on-the-side give you the much needed kick?

Actress Sherlyn Chopra confessed her need for casual sex as a boost to her self worth. The starlet was quoted as saying she doesn't mind a one-night-stand and if the sex is great, she would feel good about herself.

Aanchal Mehra, a management student agrees, "It's not about being promiscuous, but having sex with a stranger can actually lift your mood. It happened with me once when I was going through a very low phase. I went to a friend's party and hooked up with this guy. We had a blast that night and the next day we parted as friends. I felt desirable and wanted once again, and frankly I felt very happy."

The trend is recent and something that picks up from the frantic pace of urban living. Often hectic schedules and lack of socialising leaves one feeling adrift and sidelined. Thus people draw support in whichever form they can or so observes, psychologist Surendra Mehta, Care clinic, "Casual sex is on the rise because of factors like loneliness, peer pressure, living away from one's home. It happens when there's no faith left in oneself. Think of someone who doesn't have a great job or a fulfilling relationship or lacks friends to bail him/her out in times of crisis. It is then that they fall on measures that they assume can lift their spirits for some time. Sex is more like an addiction just as people tend to eat a lot when depressed."

Women don't get carried away:
Hollywood too swears by the benefits of casual sexual encounters. Leading actress Cameron Diaz for instance recently stated that there isn't a better way to get back in shape than hitting the sack. Studies too have revealed that women are less likely to regret an impromptu fling, if they feel gratified sexually afterwards. Most women don't equate a romp in the sack with a walk down the aisle. Surveys reveal that over 52 per cent believe their most recent casual encounter to be 'just a one-time thing'.

Says actor/anchor Pooja Bedi, "Having sex with someone you don't love doesn't necessarily mean you are committing a grave sin. The best part of today's society is that it is beginning to accept female sexuality. People have various things to lift their spirits, this is one of them, so be it, and it's human after all to crave for touch. And women, just like men want to enjoy their bodies. So there isn't anything wrong in indulging in casual sex as long as you know where to draw the line."

Manish Singh, a software professional, points out, "I think the key is that everyone wants to matter, especially to their sex partners. We have created a world in which we treat sex as a private recreational activity, with no moral or social significance. But when sex is a recreational activity, my partner becomes equivalent to a consumer good. And we all know what we do with consumer goods that cease to satisfy us beyond a point, we get rid of them. In this world of consumer sex, it is socially acceptable to find pleasure with people you don't love. But yes, no one likes to end up feeling used."

Casual sex to reduce boredom
Doctors claim that a session in bed with an unknown face can actually spice up your personal life. Although none would advise it, but the fact remains that it jolts you back out of your boredom and pushes you to being innovative. Says a doctor on condition of anonymity, "I have had patients who find no interest in having sex with their husbands/wives. In fact, they complain of being turned off by the very thought of it. However, a torrid fling outside marriage breathes new life into a sagging relationship with one's spouse. Does it really matter if you get back your stamina and feel good about yourself, even if your spouse was unaware of what went on behind his back?"

A recent study done by the University of Chicago on the sexual lives of adults reveals that housewives bored by their routine look for affairs outside their marriage. In fact, a one-night-stand often reignites the lost spark that may have gotten snuffed out due to marriage and monotony, a la Tabu who played the rebellious wife in the Mahesh Manjrekar's film Astitva.

The real picture
However not all is as hunky dory as you would like to believe. As Mehta puts it, "Sex with no strings attached is a great way to regain your confidence. However, not many people can sustain it. There comes point when you begin to see the worthlessness of the whole enterprise. Despite how much we claim to be liberated, people need a caring relationship all the time. Sex is an act that is over in minutes and cannot ever replace emotions like love and care."

Neerja Tanna (name changed), a journalist, reveals, "I completely believed in casual sex and felt good about it. But there came a point when I began to dread the act. It wasn't the act per se, but the time when it would get over. If the sex wasn't great, it was ok; but when it was exceptionally good, it was difficult to extract myself from that situation. And how do I not look forward to meeting that person again? So in a way I started feeling petrified about having sex with just about anyone."

According to psychologist Suparna Puri, women often get attached while having sex. The hormone Oxytocin or the attachment hormone makes them feel closer to their partner. So she advises, "Be clear about who you want to indulge yourself with". Puri believes it's alright to be daring and adventurous, but warns that the high doesn't last for long. Soon there is a sense of wanting to pull out and starting again.

As Tanna recalls, "I don't believe in casual sex anymore. Because I believe there is more to it than just plain fun. So today I have decided to seek pleasure and adventure in other things. And sex can wait till I get married." Well point taken.

Male Power
In this entire cry about women and sex, it seems men are completely pushed away from the limelight. Could the reason be that sex gets easily associated with men and thus requires not much thought? Says Atul Suri,a consultant with an MNC, "A general conception is that men are more interested in sex. However, I think nowadays women are also free spirited while men are becoming conservative. I can indulge in sexual activities with anyone, but I don't want to. My friends of course do, but I think their outlook is changing as well. Today a guy wants to be just a one-woman-man, both physically and mentally."

Explains Puri, "For men it is no longer about sex and affairs. Men today concentrate on developing healthy relationships with the opposite sex. That could also arise from the fact that they are aware that the society is open to men having casual sex, so it isn't a big deal. However for women to do the same there is the pleasure of breaking barriers and also a sense of power. So it's more of women wanting to try out new things and explore areas so far a taboo to them."

The balance though is heavily tilted towards women. And though the freedom of body is a heady feeling, yet there are certain precautions to be kept in mind:
1. Get yourself checked for AIDS and STD frequently if you are indulging in casual sex.
2. Always, always use a condom or other precautions while having sex.
3. Having a one-night-stand is okay as long as you are consciously aware of what you are doing. You don't want to fall into the wrong hands and get beaten up.
4. Steer clear of strangers who you think come across as "weird". It is better to follow your gut than being sorry later.
5. If you are someone who gets carried away emotionally, then such affairs are definitely not for you.
6. Men take heed and check the background of the person you are going out with. You could easily be led to drugs if you don't watch out.
7. If you feel any kind of discomfort physically after an intercourse, see a doctor immediately.
8. Visit a psychiatrist if you think you are going through an emotional vacuum and need help.
9. Speak to friends, family and close ones if you think your loneliness is the reason for you to hunt partners.
10. Believe in love and care because nothing works better than these.

source:timesofindia